Why Saying No is Essential and Healthy?

Have you ever been into a situation that you cannot even say “no” to something that is asked from you? Isn’t it totally frustrating that because you have a problem in saying “No” everything that you have planned ahead will be compromised?

It is a sad truth that we often disregard our own feelings because we don’t want to disappoint someone even if it costs our own freewill; but have you ever though if it is still healthy to keep on saying “yes” even if you don’t want to? The mere fact that you feel bad about it, it is nonetheless unhealthy.

Here are some rules that you should take into consideration when to say “no” and when to say “yes” accordingly:

1. Never ever say yes if you are Saying No to yourself.

An old saying reminds me so much of the virtue of honesty – Honesty is the best policy. We might be so much absorbed with the thought of being professional in the work place that we forget to become honest with our own self. Oftentimes, if you are a newbie at work, most of the seniors, although I don’t speak in general, are going to let you do the “utility” jobs like cleaning and sweeping. It is fine if you do that in your own cubicle, but if they let you do those in their very own premise, well, that is another story. You must learn to distinguish the jobs that are within your scope so that you can set limitations too. I am not saying though that you won’t exert an extra mile establishing rapport but, too much of it is not good anymore; let me label that as an abuse; yes, an abuse to your dishonesty to yourself where in fact you could have said “no”. This stands true even if you work as an intern or trainee while you are studying.

2. Remember that Saying No is not selfish.

Well, gossipers are not new in the work place. There will be eyes and ears that will be spying on you and one of the hottest pies that would entice the eaters to gather is when you say “no” into something that normally, they agree on even if it is not part of your job description. Like say for example, since you have just been promoted, they would expect you to throw a party to celebrate. Well, you have other priorities than that and despite the fact that they really want you to throw a party, you have politely said “thank you” and apologized because you cannot make the party happen, they would still be saying something bad about you. Please if this unfortunate thing happens to you, don’t ever feel guilty about it because it is not selfish. You know that your reasons are valid and thus you don’t have to explain yourself to them; in the first place, you don’t owe them an explanation.

3. It is not your responsibility to please everyone.

We all have our own deadlines, and beating the deadlines sometimes is very tough and the thought of adding some responsibility on top of your own tasks is hopeless. Please do yourself a favor and decline other jobs that are given to you even if you are not accountable into it. You don’t have to do it just to please everyone. Your job is to do your job, do it well and perform well. So, it does clearly mean that your job is not to do the job of someone else. Otherwise, you will get a portion of his salary to be fair. Saying “No” would really save you on this dilemma. Pay attention to your tasks and put your best foot forward as you do them, in that way, you are pleasing yourself, you are helping yourself and you are doing the right thing for yourself.

Is Saying No really healthy?

Saying “No” could sound mean but it is because that’s how it has been taught to us – that saying no is impolite while the truth is, it is not bad to be honest to yourself; it is not selfish to say “no” and prioritize yourself because it is necessary; it is not your obligation to help other people make their jobs because they lack proper time management. So, learn to say “no” and be healthy in all forms.

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